December 19, 2005

Nasty / Compulsive

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In a Friendster profile from some exciting looking stranger in (I think it was) France I read “I have a nasty habit of avoiding things that make me feel” and I thought it was rather elegant and wanted to write it down so I reached for my notebook and wrote “I have a compulsive habit of avoiding things that make me feel,” in less than a second misremembering the word ‘nasty’ as ‘compulsive,’ perhaps implying that I don’t find anything particularly nasty about it, or perhaps only stressing how (for me) all such endeavors are fundamentally obsessive.



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2 comments:

Robin said...

I, too, appreciate anonymous's quote because it poetically (gracefully, succinctly, and implicitly) expresses a human condition from which springs something that brings profound pain and complication to everyone's life at one point or another, and that is so often clinically and artlessly described: addiction. 'A nasty habit.'I think it significant that the writer chose such an adjective to describe the condition of yearning to be free of feeling that underlies all addictions, which, whatever their apparent objects, are in essence compulsivities. Your accidental insight extends the original to reveal another truth: compulsivities are things in themselves. By the time they can be noticed as such they have somehow taken on intractable and mysterious lives of their own, to the point where it is no longer possible to discern where host ends and parasite begins. The defining feature of neurosis is its repetitive nature. A neurotic is one stuck in a groove, who must enact the same rituals of mind or body over and over again, who has somehow lost awareness of their choice as to what organizing principles govern their lives. It does indeed take a radical cut in the nature of reality to free them again. This cut doesn't often happen but when it does it really is no overstatement to call it a miracle.

Robin said...

insert space a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality a radical cut in the TEXTURE of reality said a sensual proofreader and neurotic with woe.